A little piece of me is saying that I should feel guilty about this- why can't I get it together to be patient and kind all weekend long, even if it is 4 days? I have great intentions of spending lovely quality time with my kids this holiday season- shouldn't this be the beginning of that? What has been so terrible about this weekend, really? Nothing at all- minor aggravations, typical kid stuff, and we've been a little busy. So what's my problem?! GEEZ.
I'm telling that piece of me to shut up. I DO want to spend time with my kids and I DO want to model good behavior for my kids and I HAVE done those things this very day. However, I am NOT perfect, and I believe that's good for my kids, too. I want them to see that I get grumpy and unreasonable sometimes, too- and I want them to see that I still respect myself anyway. For the sake of their self-esteem I want them to have realistic expectations for themselves and I don't want them to feel inferior to anybody else just because they're not perfect. The sooner my kids realize that everybody messes up sometimes, the faster they'll recover every time they do. I want them to feel like it's ok to take time to themselves when they need it, so I need to feel like it's ok for me to take time to myself when I need it.
Right now the kids are happily watching something on TV, and Chris is cleaning up after dinner. I've put myself on timeout when things were a little less under control, too though. I think as long as nobody is going to get hurt, it's acceptable to step away for a few minutes. For tonight, I'm pretty sure I'm stepping away until bedtime. I'm lucky my kids are old enough that I can do that. They don't get a lot of TV time, so they won't bother doing anything else until one of us tells them to turn it off.
Charlie has decided to cuddle for the first time in months. They say cats are supposed to be good for stress, don't they? Maybe animals really can sense how we feel. It's pretty adorable, even if it does interfere with my use of the trackpad.